apple-honey-pecan muffins.

Last night, after shutting down my laptop for the night, I threw on a Spotify playlist and had a one woman dance party while Tyler and Jackson looked on with bemused looks on their face.  To be fair, Tyler nodded his head a couple of times.  Jackson on the other hand barely looked up even while i was serenading him with Queens "Somebody to Love".  This is how we end the work-day.  

This social-isolation thing does weird things to people.  I feel like my emotions ping pong every which way a thousand times a day.  Sometimes I want to scream into the abyss, other times I feel like I could do this for weeks and be OK.  Am I slowly going insane or am I slowly adjusting to a new normal?  One where pants are optional, make-up is non existent, and homemade lunches are how you find ways to break-up the day?  How does your relationship change when the only person you can really interact with is the person you're married to and is sitting 20 feet from you at all times?   

Honestly, outside of Tyler's need to snack when I know he isn't really hungry, it's kind of like he isn't really here.  I realized the other day that both of us are similar with regards to our work style.  When we are in something we are really in something and whatever is happening around us is like the noise coming out of a sound machine - there but we don't really notice it.   I find that I can more easily disengage myself when the day is over, he on the other hand needs someone to say close the computer.  It's interesting when you realize you know a person so well, but aspects of them you don't know because you've really never been privy to them before.   

I think the thing I've learned from all of this is that you have to figure out a way to make some kind of joy each day.  For me that joy comes from food and eating and I've been using this time to try all of the recipes I never would have time to try.  Things I've had bookmarked for a year are now finally being made.  Sunday morning breakfasts that used to be simple meals are now (slightly) over the top -  homemade muffins.  Fresh granola.  Things like that.  It's fun to try new things.   

I made these muffins this past Sunday.  They were a real delight.  I especially liked the fact that you could make the batter and apples up to 2 days earlier.  On Sunday morning I simply assembled them as instructed and baked them up.  We both eat 2 while watching a couple of episodes of Shitt's Creek.  It made for a fantastic distraction.   

Apple-Honey-Pecan Muffins
Recipe from Ochre Bakery via Bon Appetit 

Feel free to sub the pecans for hazlenuts or another favorite nut! 

2 medium Pink Lady or Jonagold apples
⅔ cup (75 g) pecans
2 Tbsp. unsalted butter
2 Tbsp. honey
Flaky sea salt
¾ cup (100 g) all-purpose flour
½ cup (60 g) spelt flour or all-purpose flour
1½ tsp. baking powder
¼ tsp. baking soda
½ tsp. kosher salt
2 large eggs, room temperature
¾ cup (150 g) granulated sugar
¾ cup plus 2 Tbsp. extra-virgin olive oil
½ cup buttermilk
Raw sugar or granulated sugar (for sprinkling)

Place a rack in middle of oven; preheat to 350°. Lightly coat flat top of a standard 12-cup muffin pan with nonstick spray (this will prevent muffins from gluing themselves to the pan). Line cups with double layers of muffin liners. Cut apples into quarters; remove cores. Cut each quarter into 4 wedges; set aside.

Pulse pecans in a food processor until you have a fine meal with a bit of texture, like coarse sand. Heat a large skillet over medium-high, then add pecans and toast, stirring, until darkened and very fragrant (it’s okay if they’re even a tiny bit burnt in spots), about 3 minutes. Transfer to a large bowl and let cool slightly.

Wipe out skillet and return to medium-high heat. Melt butter, swirling pan so that it’s evenly coated, until foaming, then add reserved apples. Drizzle with honey and generously sprinkle with sea salt. Cook, tossing often, until apples are tender and deep golden brown and glazed with honey, about 5 minutes. Scrape into a medium bowl and let cool.

Add all-purpose flour, spelt flour, baking powder, baking soda, and kosher salt to nuts; whisk to combine. Beat eggs and granulated sugar in the bowl of a stand mixer fitted with the whisk attachment on high speed until mixture is thick, pale, and tripled in volume, 8–10 minutes.

Combine oil and buttermilk in a measuring glass. With motor running, gradually pour into egg mixture, stopping as soon as incorporated to prevent eggs from deflating. Scrape into bowl with dry ingredients and fold until just combined (be careful not to overmix). Scoop about 2 Tbsp. batter into each muffin cup and place an apple slice on top. Divide remaining batter among muffin cups, filling until just below the top (you may have a spoonful or two of batter left over). Place 1 apple slice on top of each, then spoon any glaze left in the bowl on top. (You’ll have a few leftover apple slices; eat them.) Sprinkle each muffin with some raw sugar and a pinch of sea salt.

Bake muffins until golden brown all over, rotating pan halfway through, 22–28 minutes. Let cool in pan 10 minutes, then transfer to a wire rack and let cool completely.

Do Ahead: Batter can be made 2 days ahead. Cover and chill.

caramelized shallot pasta.

Strange times we're in.  

This morning I woke up in bed next to Tyler with Jackson nestled in between us and I thought that with these two, a cooking imagination that has no barriers, and more then enough food and books and puzzles (+ The Office) it will be possible to survive.  That maybe at the end of all of this I'll realize i don't need much.  

But I don't think that's the case (though the above things will get me very far in this and in life!).  

As humans, we are who we are because of the things around us.  They tell a story; they make us feel complete.  I'm not dressing how I would for work but I'm still trying to be me.  Wearing earrings.  Nice sweaters.  But with leggings and sparkly socks.   I'm trying to still feel like myself every day.  I still need things to make me feel like myself.     

The thing I really long for is the rituals and collective energy of the people I would encounter and speak with each and every day.  My favorite barista at Cafe Grumpy.  The kind people at Leo Sourdough that always set aside for me one of there pepita loaves so I can pick them up later in the day.  The farmers at Lani's farm who always point me in the direction of what greens are the best that week.  In preparation  (though if we are being honest I do this even when we aren't in the midst of a pandemic) I stocked up on the things I love.  Right now, a room over from where I am sitting, I have a freezer full of pastries and bread and produce that make me me.  They are the memories and moments and adventures I've had over the past weeks and months locked away in an ice chest until i need to break out a reminder of what the world is like outside of this new normal.  I'm worried about all the people and places I hold a connection with.  Where will they be on the other side of this?  How can I help them survive?  Because without those things, who wants to live here?   

As a glass half full kind of person, I'm done my best to seek out the positives that come from this experience.  I now get to take multiple walks with Tyler and Jackson each day.  I can cook myself lunch!  I can read books and do puzzles instead of scrolling through websites when I need a break.  I can run!  I can labor over cooking projects since I'm here all day (will I finally make croissants??).   

At some point it will be summer and I keep telling myself that it will be the sweetest summer ever.  But until then, hunker down, cook, draw, move, and dream about life on the other side.  Do what you can to help the things and people you love.   

Caramelized Shallot Pasta
Recipe via the NYTimes

This sauce is BANANAS good.  It keeps in the fridge for over a week.  You can make it with pantry staples!  I like it on pasta but i really love it tossed with beans on a piece of garlic rubbed bread.  

¼ cup olive oil
6 large shallots, very thinly sliced
5 garlic cloves, 4 thinly sliced, 1 finely chopped
 Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper
1 teaspoon red-pepper flakes, plus more to taste
1 (2-ounce) can anchovy fillets (about 12), drained
1 (4.5-ounce) tube or (6-ounce) can of tomato paste (about 1/2 to 3/4 cup)
10 ounces pasta
1 cup parsley, leaves and tender stems, finely chopped
 Flaky sea salt

Heat olive oil in a large heavy-bottomed Dutch oven over medium high. Add shallots and thinly sliced garlic, and season with salt and pepper. Cook, stirring occasionally, until the shallots have become totally softened and caramelized with golden-brown fried edges, 15 to 20 minutes.
Add red-pepper flakes and anchovies. (No need to chop the anchovies; they will dissolve on their own.) Stir to melt the anchovies into the shallots, about 2 minutes.

Add tomato paste and season with salt and pepper. Cook, stirring constantly to prevent any scorching, until the tomato paste has started to cook in the oil a bit, caramelizing at the edges and going from bright red to a deeper brick red color, about 2 minutes. Remove from heat and transfer about half the mixture to a resealable container, leaving the rest behind. (These are your leftovers to be used elsewhere: in another batch of pasta or smeared onto roasted vegetables, spooned over fried eggs or spread underneath crispy chicken thighs.)

To serve, cook pasta according to package instructions in a large pot of salted boiling water until very al dente (perhaps more al dente than usual). Transfer to Dutch oven with remaining shallot mixture (or a skillet if you are using the leftover portion) and 1 cup pasta water. Cook over medium-high heat, swirling the skillet to coat each piece of pasta, using a wooden spoon or spatula to scrape up any bits on the bottom, until pasta is thick and sauce has reduced and is sticky, but not saucy, 3 to 5 minutes.

In a small bowl, combine parsley and finely chopped garlic clove, and season with flaky salt and pepper. Divide pasta among bowls, or transfer to one large serving bowl, and top with parsley mixture and a bit more red-pepper flakes, if you like.

creamy braised white beans.

Back in October of last year, I signed up for the Rancho Gordo Bean club.  If you’re not familiar with Rancho Gordo, they are an heirloom dried bean company based in California that works with farmers to grow long-forgotten or previously hard to find varieties of beans (along with more common bean types).  Their beans are a real game changer – super beautiful, incredibly flavorful, and very fresh -  the beans cook up far faster than anything you can buy in a supermarket.  I honestly think signing up for this bean club is the best thing I’ve done in a while. 

As you can imagine, we are now eating a lot of beans which is both good for us and good for the environment.  Since joining, I’ve been cooking a pound of beans every weekend and then pushing myself to come up with new recipes/ways to eat them (though if we are being honest, my preferred meal is a simple bowl of beans in served with a little bean broth, olive oil, and a piece of really good bread).  It’s been fun.  It’s also nice coming home and having one meal component done and then just figuring out how to toss it all together.

I’ve been cooking a LOT of different recipes (and experimenting with homemade bean burgers) but so far, the best thing I’ve made, and the dish I keep coming back to is this Creamy Braised White beans.   This is pure comfort food and the kind of thing I feel like I could eat daily if you let me.  It’s easily adaptable – I’ve thrown spinach or arugula into it.  I’ve been known to top it with comte instead of parmesan.  I’ve made it with a couple of different vartities of white beans and all of them are great.   The original recipe calls for canned  but it is so much better with the real deal beans.   

I just wrote 325 words on beans and I think I could still write 500 more.  

Creamy Braised White Beans
Recipe Adapted from the NYTimes

1 tablespoon unsalted butter
1 head garlic, halved crosswise
1 cup whole milk
30 ounces white beans (any kind or a combination of 2 kinds) + ¾ - 1 cup bean broth (though you may decide you want additional broth)
1 thyme sprig, 2 sage leaves or 1 bay leaf
⅛ teaspoon ground nutmeg, allspice or garam masala
Kosher salt and black pepper
4 slices crusty bread or thick toast
Extra-virgin olive oil, for serving
Freshly grated Parmesan, comte, or another favorite cheese, for serving
Aleppo pepper or red-pepper flakes, for serving

In a medium saucepan, melt the butter over medium-high heat. Add the garlic, cut side down, and cook until golden brown, 1 to 2 minutes.

Add the milk, beans and their liquid, thyme and nutmeg and stir to combine. Season generously with salt and pepper. When the mixture begins to bubble around the edges of the pan (you don’t want it to come to a full boil), reduce the heat to low and let it simmer, stirring occasionally, until it has thickened and tastes great to you, about 15 minutes. Season with salt and pepper, to taste.

Use a fork to remove the garlic halves from the beans. Set aside until cool enough to handle, then use the fork to remove the cloves from the skins. Spread the cloves on bread or toast.

If you would like the beans to be more stew-like, mash some of the beans using a potato masher or the back of a spoon. Serve beans and milk in bowls. Garnish as you wish, with a drizzle of oil, a sprinkle of Parmesan and a pinch of Aleppo pepper and black pepper. Serve with the bread alongside for dipping.

thumbprints with dulce de leche.

I wouldn’t feel right if it didn’t post a new cookie recipe during the month of December.

With that being said, I haven’t been baking that much.  I’ve found most of the cookie recipes that came out this year felt gimmicky and were created solely for the purpose of likes on Instagram.  (I’m talking lots of bright colors and an excessive amount of sprinkles.)   In my mind, most holiday cookies should come in shades of beige – shortbread, snowballs, linzer cookies.  That is where my allegiance lies.  I’ve been combing through the backlogs of some of my favorite blogs.  Unearthing recipes that are in line with what I really want to eat – rugelach, brown butter shortbread, ginger cookies. 

This isn’t to say all the 2019 cookies recipes were a disappointment.   The one that spoke to me successfully straddled the line between tradition (thumbprints) and new (dulce de leche) – it was a perfect marriage of old and new and the resulting cookie received such rave reviews from the guinea pigs in my office that I think it’s going to become a permanent fixture in holiday cookie box. 

Thumbprints With Dulce de Leche

Recipe from the NYTimes

The NYTimes shares a bunch of variations so these are truly a “choose-your-own adventure” cookie.  Below, this includes the variation I made.  

3 ounces/85 grams whole pecans (3/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons)

2 ¼ cups/290 grams all-purpose flour, plus 2 teaspoons

1 cup/225 grams unsalted butter (2 sticks), softened

⅔ cup/135 grams granulated sugar

2 large egg yolks, at room temperature

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

½ teaspoon kosher salt

⅓ cup dulce de leche

Heat oven to 350 degrees. Spread the pecans out on a small baking sheet and cook in oven, shaking several times, until toasted, 10 to 12 minutes.

Once cooled, transfer the nuts to a food processor, preferably a mini one. Add 2 teaspoons flour and pulse just until nuts are finely ground, being careful not to overprocess.

In the bowl of a stand mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, cream together butter and granulated sugar on medium-high speed until light and fluffy, 2 to 3 minutes, scraping bowl as needed. Add egg yolks and vanilla, and beat on medium-high speed until well combined, about 2 minutes, scraping the bowl a few times as needed.

Add 1/2 cup ground nuts, the salt and the remaining 2 1/4 cups flour; beat on low speed just until combined, then increase speed and beat until dough starts to clump together. Scrape the bowl and fold a few times to make sure everything is well mixed. Wrap dough in plastic wrap, flatten into a disk, and chill until firm, at least 1 hour and up to 3 days.

Heat oven to 350 degrees. Pinch off small pieces of dough the size of a rounded tablespoon (about 20 grams each) and roll the top half of each one in the remaining ground nuts. Place a few inches apart on parchment- or silicone mat-lined baking sheets. Chill in the freezer until firm, about 10 minutes.

Bake for 8 minutes, remove from oven and make a thumbprint in each cookie. Bake until golden brown on the bottom, and nuts are looking toasty but not burned, 6 to 8 minutes longer. Let cool a few minutes on the baking sheets and transfer to wire racks to cool further. While the cookies are still a little warm, fill each one with about 1/2 teaspoon of filling, and cool completely. Sprinkle with flaky sea salt. Cookies will keep in an airtight container at room temperature for up to 1 week.

carrot flan.

I've been thinking lately that while I'm cooking a lot I'm, I'm cooking what is referred to as to as "mommy blogger food".  The food is good!  Very good!  Healthy!  Filling!  Satisfying!  But is it exciting?  Is it remarkable?  Is it even worth writing about?  Unsure.   I think it’s good that people post those types of recipes – the things you can make in 30 minutes or less on a Tuesday evening.  It’s the kind of food I want to eat and make most nights of the week but I’m not sure it’s the kind of food I want to write about.   

The kind of recipes that make me run to this site to jot down my thoughts are the kind of recipes that teach me something.  That have interesting techniques.  They turn a humble ingredient into something that delights.  They make me say holy shit this is good.   

I’ve had this recipe bookmarked since I bought this cookbook earlier this year.  I think I book-marked it because I wasn’t sure what a carrot flan would be like.  Would it be delicious?  Odd?  Would I know it was eating carrots?  I made it around Halloween because it felt seasonally appropriate (and very on-color theme) but now that I’ve made it, I think it would be fantastic addition to a Thanksgiving dessert table.  

The consensus is that carrot flan is delicious.  Earthy but rich and comforting.  You would never guess it’s filled with carrots though I’m less sure what most people would think it tastes like.  Squash?  Something else?  Regardless, I think it belongs on a Thanksgiving table.  You can make it a couple of days ahead!  Requires no reheating on the day of!  It’s 5 ingredients (all of which I imagine you already have on hand)!  It provides a very simple end to a very traditionally over –the-top meal.     Also leftovers make a fantastic morning-after-Thanksgiving breakfast.  Especially when paired with good coffee and a good book.   

Carrot Flan
Recipe from My Mexico City Kitchen: Recipes and Convictions by Gabriela Camara

If you don’t have a flameproof baking pan, it is OK. You probably won’t be able to invert the flan after it is chilled, but you would still be able to cut it in perfect wedges.

1 pound 2 ounces carrots
¾ cup whole milk
1 cup granulated sugar
⅔ cup unsalted butter, melted
6 eggs

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Thoroughly scrub the carrots but don’t bother peeling them. Cut the carrots into 4 pieces so that they fit comfortably in a medium pot.
Place carrots in pot. Cover with water and bring to a boil. Cook carrots for about 15 minutes, until just soft. Pour them into a colander and let cool completely. Press out any excess water.

Bring a full kettle of water to a boil.

In a blender, combine carrots, milk, sugar, butter and eggs, and mix at high speed, until smooth. Grease a 10½-inch flameproof baking pan with butter. Pour mixture into pan. Place in a roasting pan. Fill roasting pan with boiling water to reach at least halfway up outside of baking pan.

Bake flan for 1 hour, 30 minutes. Place flan on a cooling rack to cool. When flan has cooled to room temperature, refrigerate overnight.

When ready to serve, place flan on stove over low heat and warm slightly to loosen the sides. Place a serving plate over pan and invert pan and plate together so that flan falls onto the plate.

Slice flan and serve with sweetened whipped cream.

big beans and tomato vinaigrette.

Two weeks ago I returned from vacation in Portugal.  I want to write about it.  And I will!  At some point!  Mostly because people keep asking me for my itinerary (I think this is a testament to what an epic planner I am)  but I haven’t gone through all my photos and I’m still waiting on film to come back and I figure when I can finally digest everything, I’ll write about it.

Until then,  let’s talk about produce.  Specifically tomatoes. 

Most days I’m dreaming about tomato sandwiches.  Weekends are for making tomato confit in an effort to freeze a little bit of summer.  I’m spending a lot of money on heirloom tomatoes in every shape, size, and color.  There are worse vices you could have.   

I’ve made this dish twice since seeing it in the August issue of Bon Appetit.  I can’t even begin to tell you how much I love it - it can actually be a meal!  Especially if you round it out with some good bread and a couple of nice cheeses.  If you’re fortunate enough to live near a farmers market where you can get fresh beans, use them here. 

Big Beans and Tomato Vinaigrette

Recipe via Bon Appetit

For the Beans

Handful of oregano sprigs

Handful of thyme sprigs

2 bay leaves

8 oz. dried butter beans, rinsed, soaked overnight if possible

1 medium onion, halved

1 large carrot, scrubbed, coarsely chopped

Kosher salt

¼ cup extra-virgin olive oil

For the Vinaigrette and Assembly

10 oz. cherry tomatoes or 1½ cups chopped heirloom or beefsteak tomatoes

1 garlic clove, smashed

3 Tbsp. red wine vinegar

⅓ cup extra-virgin olive oil, plus more for drizzling

Kosher salt

2 lb. assorted heirloom, beefsteak, and/or cherry tomatoes

Freshly ground black pepper

Handful of basil leaves

Mild red pepper flakes (such as Aleppo-style or Maras)

Make the Beans - Tie together oregano, thyme, and bay leaves with kitchen twine. Combine beans, onion, carrot, and herbs in a medium pot. Pour in water to cover beans by about 4" and bring to a very gentle simmer over medium-high heat. Immediately reduce heat and cook at the barest of simmers, stirring hardly at all, until beans are creamy and tender at the center but not falling apart or mushy, about 1½ hours (this could take longer, depending on the beans). The key is to not agitate, which will help the beans maintain their shape. Remove pot from heat; season beans aggressively with salt. Gently stir in oil. Let cool. Drain beans; discard onion, carrot, and herbs.

Do Ahead: Beans can be made 2 days ahead. Keep in liquid; cover and chill.

Vinaigrette and Assembly - Purée cherry tomatoes in a blender. Transfer to a small bowl and stir in garlic, vinegar, and ⅓ cup oil; season with salt. Let sit 15–20 minutes, then pluck out garlic.

Transfer drained beans to a medium bowl and add vinaigrette; toss gently to coat. Taste and add more salt if needed.

Slice, halve, or quarter heirloom tomatoes and arrange on a platter or divide among individual plates. Season with salt and pepper and drizzle with oil. Spoon beans along with plenty of vinaigrette over; top with basil and a few pinches of red pepper flakes.